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FUNNY BIRTHDAY QUOTES -- for the ladies
Funny birthday quotes directed at women seen cruel when men say them. But they are really funny when women say them. It is indeed a blessing that we can laugh at ourselves. In that laughter is a joy and even power, a sense of "I have overcome the greatest stigma attached to women." I'm not sure men can feel that, since men "mature", while women just "grow old". So join me for some very funny birthday quotes from some very funny ladies. ** ** An archaeologist is the best husband a woman
can have because the older she gets the more interested he becomes. If things get better with age, then you're
approaching magnificent. You've logged so many miles in the voyage of
life that you've been upgraded to First Class! After 40 a woman has to choose between losing
her figure or her face. My advice is to keep your face and stay sitting
down. With the grace of God and a good lighting
director, I plan to stick around for a good long time. I like this funny birthday quote from a pillar of beauty: Nature gives you the face you have at twenty,
but it's up to you to merit the face you have at 50. Katherine Hepburn's tart sense of humor comes through in this funny birthday quote: 'Isn't it fun getting older'
is really a terrible fallacy. That's like saying I prefer driving an old car
with a flat tyre. Nobody's "old" anymore -- they've
just been around for a long time. The hardest years in life are those between
10 and 70. Discussing how old you are is the temple of
boredom. Perhaps one has to be very old before one
learns how to be amused rather than shocked. Authorities say brain cells may shrink, but
they don't necessarily die. Frankly, I am cheered by the fact that
something is shrinking. I'd be even more thrilled if what was shrinking
affected my dress size, but you can't have everything. I feel like a million tonight -- but one at a
time. From birth to age 18, a girl needs god
parents. From 18 to 35, she needs good looks. From 35 to 55, she
needs a good personality. From 55 on, she needs good cash. No one grows old by living -- only by losing
interest in living. I believe in hard work. It keeps the
wrinkles out of the mind and the spirit. It helps to keep a woman young.
It certainly keeps women alive. You grow up the day you have your first real
laugh -- at yourself. Count on the gorgeous Gabor sisters to have funny birthday quotes: I believe in loyalty. When a woman
reaches an age she likes, she should stick with it. When you're 20 and pretty, then you're rather
like Switzerland -- beautiful but dull. Happiness is good health and a bad memory. The lovely thing about being 40 is that you
can appreciate 25 year old men. I think all this talk about age is
foolish. Every time I'm one year older, everyone else is tool. I think on-stage nudity is disgusting,
shameful and damaging to all things American. But if I were 22 with a
great body, it would be artistic, tasteful, patriotic and a progressive
religious experience. Bonnie has the right idea in this funny birthday quote: You can't turn back the clock. But you
can wind it up again. We are always the same age inside. There are only three ages for women in
Hollywood: Babe, District Attorney and Driving Miss Daisy. My candle burns at both ends;
Back to top of Funny Birthday Quotes Also see |
Ms. Hepburn's Page.
Truly, few women actually look more beautiful in later years, but the majesty that Katherine Hepburn brought to her life -- in films and off -- makes her one of the most beautiful women Hollywood ever created. Here she is on the set of "Rooster Cogburn", one of her last movies.
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